Stupidity on Sunset Drive


And the Winner Is…
Sunset Drive in Sterling!

“Person is petrified of a long, wiggly bug in her closet. Transferred to animal control, recommended using vacuum cleaner to remove it, but she didn’t want to go near it. Officer assisted once available. The bug was not found and she will call if it returns.”

…. I’m speechless. Tax dollars people. This is where they’re going. Typically I’d presume that she felt like a massive idiot; But since she’ll “call if it returns,” I’m going go with genuinely insane instead.

Runner-Ups

Clinton:
2/19 – 11:51p

Shadow of person in the hallway
….It’s the Boogie Man! Run to save your life!!


Clinton:
2/21 – 4:48p

Chronic litterer reported.
…. “Sir, you’re under arrest and being diagnosed with Chronic Littering Disorder. Have fun in Rubbish Rehab.

Clinton:
2/21 – 2:14p

Man acting in strange manner.
….Describe strange for me, I’m curious.

Berlin:
2/18 – 12:32p

Horse is in deep water at a farm. No answer at residence. Called back, horse is out of water.
….Phew! Thank heavens. I swear those farm-folk have nothing better to worry about.

Berlin:
2/20 – 1:52p

Box of book found on side of the road.
….Thrilling, really thrilling.

Sterling:
2/16 – 9:34a

Four youths on bikes look like “gang members in area to case houses.” They’re heading to W.Boylston. Leominster Police contacted to see if any bikes had been stolen. Nothing was reported.
…. False alarm on the Sterling Street Gangs.

A Creepy Conclusion


Sterling:
2/19 – 2:16a

Truck driving through railroad crossing at Pratts Junction & is still there with operator trying to start it. All trains are being held for property damage on tracks. Vehicle is now unattended. There is a large amount of blood and the steering column is cracked. Operator is likely to have injuries. Vehicle was impounded, and no one home at address inside vehicle. Hospitals will call if the owner shows up for treatment.
…. Definitely not funny. Creepy though, fucking creepy.

Stay out of trouble this week kiddos.

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